I often wonder what it is that makes us think we are alone in the rough edges of our lives. Why is it so easy to think that no one could even approach understanding? It's so foolish to think "no one knows." Even the words I've heard in some songs should teach me that. Besides, I have found time and time again that if I would just suck it up and open my mouth (my heart, really) to my friends, I'm not going to get a blank stare or a fake smile of sympathy. I'm going to be encouraged, even if just by virtue of the fact that I know they love me and are listening.
It's so dangerous to wallow in pain and hardship and yet not share it...'wallowing' is such an awkward, ugly word, but i think accurately decribes the sentiment I'm trying to convey here.
What I would say I don't understand is why it isn't easier. In the ideal world, bathed in righteousness and God's perfect love that casts out all fear, everyone in the community of believers would be so in tune with one another that sheer freedom with each other would characterize all our interactions. We would be so continuously connected in spirit that sharing in everything would be the most natural thing in the world, and happily we would tell something if we needed to. There would instinctively, automatically, be no barriers.
Thing is, though, I'm afraid I do understand....and that what I just described is heaven, more or less, and we as humans beings can only long for that perfect community.
That being said, I'll not neglect to rejoice in the measures of grace God has imparted to me over the years by way of my brothers and sisters.
As a very wise man once phrased it, "I thank my God upon every remembrance of you..."
:)
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you are NOT alone, obviously.
but i was internally laughing telling someone the other day how you and i seem to always have issues at the same time. i'm thankful though...makes life much more bearable most of the time. :)
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