ramble and muse (again)

i am listening to Shiny Toy Guns' "Le Disko"....if that song does not make you want to be a rock star, I don't know what could.

my life has been a ridiculous whirlwind the past few months, and while the job-related contribution to that isn't going to slow down for at least a few more weeks probably, i am forcing the rest to chill out. i miss hanging out with people i love. and i miss taking care of myself (sleep, etc.). i am excited :) i am going to paint again soon! i am going to play an instrument that is not the cello at an open mic night! i am chopping half my hair off tomorrow! i am getting to bed by 11pmish instead of 2amish!

[clearly, my job has sapped all the written eloquence out of me lately. :P but let the spastic sprawling thoughts continue...]

I went to my first therapy session on Monday for dealing with some family-related issues, and it was great and went by way too fast. i have said for years that I think everyone could probably benefit from therapy/counseling of some kind, and i am finally following my own advice. it's going to be...who knows what, but "ultimately a very good thing," i am quite certain. not easy...but good. i am so thankful for the opportunity. and excited about what it might mean for me.

i went to yet another funeral last week. my hallmate at work had a heart attack over the weekend. he was often the only one around when i had to work late into the night (he sometimes worked nights instead of days b/c of certain health issues). he was a funny guy, a gem i wish i had known better. i still forget he's not there sometimes. i walked into his office yesterday, and an open Coke can was still sitting on his desk.

i don't mean this morbidly, but i think it's so strange how much death i've had to experience this year. i guess i'm just grateful none of it was really with someone very personally close to me...though my heart goes out to those for whom it was..

well, there were many more thoughts swirling through my head, but now that Rich Price [if his songs do not make you want to fall in love i don't know what could] is playing, i am getting sleeepy :) goodnight. may my next post be more coherent.