el Señor nos promete

Contrary to what I had anticipated, last night just got worse and worse! For a while.

I declined my habit's request to play the iPod on the drive home from work. I've been listening to an audio version of A Tale of Two Cities, especially when I'm bored or want to be distracted, but my gut wouldn't let me go there last night...as much as I wanted to forget, I didn't want to forget on purpose.

So I thought, and thoughtandthoughtandthought, and then prayed that God would use this, use me, got scared, then prayed aloud, "You're going to have to hold my hand through this," then promptly burst into tears. Sobbed down highway 42, felt sick, drove to dear friends' house, they weren't home. Went directly to praise band practice instead, good thing, I was the only vocalist who showed. Noticed I was shaking a bit while pulling out the music, started singing, started to feel better. "Blessed be Your name when I'm found in the desert place; though I walk in the wilderness, blessed be Your name...Your strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow; great is Thy faithfulness...And as I look upon your name, circumstances fade away. Now your glory steals my heart...Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art. Heart of my own heart, whatever befall, still be my vision, ruler of all."

I had another song on my brain last night too, though I couldn't quite place it, couldn't remember the words...went home, looked it up, remembered how much I do love Cool Hand Luke:

"Hey, it's me
I'm sorry it's so late
I can't sleep
I knew you'd be awake
You're always home
Waiting by the phone
For nights like these
When I'm feeling all alone
...You're the one who comforts me
When everyone has gone away
...I will keep on singing because You hear me
And I will keep on smiling because You're near me
I'll sleep well on a promise tonight."


And I did.