Saturday, November 25, 2006

wow..

Yep, two in one day.

I didn't mean to, but I just ended up reading a bunch of old posts back from the inception of this little bloggy a year and some months ago, and, I have to tell you, it was more than a little unsettling.

Not because I was a complete dork and an immature child, which was what I experienced when I read a bunch of old xangas from freshman year five or six months ago. No, it was unsettling because I'm pretty sure I was smarter a year ago than I am now. And more honest. At least, that's how those posts sound.

This one really caught me off guard, because I could have written it today, except that I had forgotten it. I'm glad to have read it again:

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"do you ever get frustrated with the discrepancy between what you say you want to do and what you actually do?

do you ever feel sad when you remember that God in no way consumes all aspects of your life, which He more than merits?

do you ever feel like you're not even close to fulfilling your grace-given potential?

do you ever get afraid that God grieves your stubbornness?

do you ever feel like sometimes you waste the Father's time with what He's entrusted to you?



Not to sound defeatist (on the contrary, it is definitely a thought that brings me joy and inspires courage), but...I can't wait til I get to go home. :)

In the meantime...

Take my life and let it be
consecrated, Lord, to Thee.
Take my moments and my days,
let them flow in ceaseless praise.
Take my hands and let them move
at the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet and let them be
swift and beautiful for Thee."
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I'm glad to have read it again, but it disturbs me a little that i had not really articulated it like that to myself recently. Thanks, past-self. Too bad i feel like you're smarter than me now.

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